MC RISES I was alarmed by the morning news So I threw a tiger palm strike to the snooze Smashed it pieces, but I was sleepless So I arose and crafted a thesis Roaches love tooth paste, they'll eat it all night So leave the cap on, pass the mic And I'll teach you how to get a rap on Shed some light for you to clap on All the rudegirls call me Space Rocker #1 It's the Ward Chief MC Devlin Never partied out like Phil in the Gremlin While you're tremblin', I'm steady assemblin' Alive as I drive a Durango 95, I'm taking a dive If you're feeling sad I got a junkyard dog and a bass-line shaking the hive It's a real jam-splitter, with a neural transmitter taking your taste buds from sour to bitter Stand back y'all, it's a powerful hitter Play the warning track, go on Clean up all the litter while you're out there Everybody shout "yeah"! Gonna bring it down here for the world renown man who makes you loco It's Mr.McKinney, to derail a train from the track with a penny And then there's me, the mayor of Loungopolis Laid back on the mic for the populace I offer your section rap protection Phone the DJ, make a selection In Boston with a big dog in no muzzle Trying to run, I got you caught in the middle Crossing words up, forming a puzzle Then I will shake the can n' tag you up with a riddle Brightly shone is a signal lit like a shimmering phantom in the sky As you ask yourself in these times of violence "How will I ever survive?" Let me be Frank, like Castle, I'm gonna get lethal Even Buddha had to conquer evil We're living in a city full of peril and danger Where it is a gamble even leaving the manger That's why I'm rockin' these spiky gauntlets Lots of gangs want to crush me to bits Even if they kill me I'll haunt through hits I'll be dead and my wits still burn through mitts Trying to handle the masters tools, chances are you'll get cut While you're lifting weights, I'm shifting plates 'til all the volcanoes erupt I stir up the rivers and roil the seas Heat up the oil for boiling thieves Rising high above a redwood tree Is an uppercase M and a capital C Galaxy to Galaxy there is no place we can't go When Devlin's on the microphone and Dan is on piano MC Rises, full of surprises, master of disguises We're fully permitted to demolish your demo Didn't you get the memo? Podemos volar por todos las nebulosas Cuando M C se enloquece con las cosas MC Rises

THE DEVLIN MANOR OF SPEECH My rhyme-book's a sewer trench covered in graffiti Riddled with apparitions so no vagrants pitch a tipi It's here I've recorded many deep space missions As a preposition magician or a noun scoundrel with the adjective broadsword, I'll make you walk the verb plank like the rudegirl who poured sugar in my word bank Now I gotta squeeze a golden goose for the filling of the cavity, it got real as the dentist was stabbing me I socked him in the chops with a tube of Crest in fist And dipped from the office with the cute receptionist I'm a silver-bullet tongue cunning linguist Besieged Wolfenstein and I'm still learning English I taught myself to read so I could goof off in school Who knew one day I would grab the mic and act a fool I once wore my clothes backwards at a talent show Now I write grim rhymes like Edgar Allan Poe I took the stage gallantly on world wide tours For ten bucks an hour I'll pressure wash your floors On every song I sent 'em, I've been interjecting venom My conjunction is a function between speech and rhythm Bread-Butter-Cheese-Meat-Cheese-Butter-Bread Can you get what I'm saying through your head? Eco-catastrophe, geodesic dome upon the cinder cone Blue ribbon microphone tone Bread-Butter-Cheese-Meat-Cheese-Butter-Bread Kid, get what I'm saying through your head Our bass stimulation is a space simulation Magnified sun ray, face incineration My wife is a Latina, four legged ballerina who I met while drinking quarts of ports in Catalina Last night she saw my statue in a dream with many spouts pouring my mortal blood forming a stream And wash their hands did many lusty Romans It doesn't take a genius to know when trust an omen I henched it back to the trenches for a thousands cenches Looking like a caveman on the benches When suddenly a star from the belt of Orion came flying out the sky at me screaming like a siren I wield a mitt like a shield, swing a bat like a sword and smashed it to pieces like a rotten gourd The result was an explosion of such magnitude the entire universe cracked and snapped in two Grabbing one side in my left hand, the other in my right I slapped 'em back together and screwed the lags tight A banquet was held that night, fools were grillin' Oxen were slaughtered and the people got their fillin' Wine was served, bowl after bowl Fifty or sixty rounds, it was out of control Despues la fiesta, yo fui por siesta Por favor mi esposa, no mas pesadillas!

BAT SWOOPS DOWN Like Ledger made Nicholson look like Romero My style makes a Pterodactyl look like a sparrow Fly as the violent path of a crossbow arrow Piercing your bone, going straight through the marrow I come from the asylum in the bowels of the narrows I got you in a warehouse strapped to a barrels Drinkin' nog, rapping holiday carols While I'm still Rockin' that seasonal, bullet-proof apparel Living by the plant left y'all punks sterile Where as I'm avid and virile, rather rabid and feral I bust through the sentries at the gate Now I'm gonna heavily precipitate With raging winds that crush your bones beneath your skin Upon these banks is an ancient temple In the burial grounds we'll assemble A languid silence upon the doomed To be continued or to be entombed That is the question, MC Rises, court is in session And my court is a court of no fun (On with the procession!) Your rap is a bore, elementary rhyming Confined to the 4/4 timing Blue square chumps, I'm hitting the jumps on a double black diamond Widen the sky and revolutionizing A brand new style, y'all fools get climbin' Devlinola, I dare you to step to me Riding the clouds in the storm of the century Taming the dragon So why are you bragging about capping a deputy? I destroyed the whole force and one thousand armies with my disastrous recipe Jabronies, fraudulent phonies You're lackin' flavor even doused in Tony's I slaughter the whole cow herd with a halberd plus the ponies, And I chopped your tongue off for speaking a foul word No, I really can't condone these mannerless heathens with no respect Their selfish actions are very deplorable I'm on the set with a wolf-toothed cudgel I'm a rap Shao Kahn and I'll smash thou's song The result was horrible, though perhaps still a bit too subtle Detained for observation Broke free from where he was bound Sights locked in on a location Then rudeboy bombs up the town I live day to day by the skin of my teeth My sword never gets one second to rest in the sheath At peace, I'm beyond belief or disbelief These simple quandaries are a falling leaf In the sea of wonder that I stand beneath Showers and thunder, pillage and plunder The village is under, ten feet of water Head for the high-grounds, All band together Don't turn savage, Let arrows fly if fiends ravage When they land it'll boost your average I carry out courageous deeds Keep track of 'em on the abacus beads If from outta the reeds comes a bayou rugaru Slashing the tires on your Subaru Don't fear, I'll appear with the silver spear bravely rescuing you I can accept no reward, I deserve no praise or even applaud I'm an ordinary man with a few simple talents I've taken an oath and accepted the challenge protect the people, defend the planet Abate the nefarious ones and preserve the balance

ONE SOLID CONNECTION I was working in my lab, late one night Chillin' on the slab, waiting for the lightning to strike Now my dog has hands, and I have paws Sometimes experiments will leave you with claws So I slash what's left of your funeral rites I slash a mic open and the cable ignites I'll burn your bridge so you can't finish the song 'Cause that thing's been playing way too long While you're in the river drowning your label head is frowning I drag him to England and then loan him a pounding Now his stupid white fur coat turns red Like he's at the formal getting buckets dumped on his head I'm blasting your fans like an out of tune brass band My raps can leave the stands abandoned like Jazz Land Or they can hypnotize the crowd, but never sympathize with weak emcees ALL MUST BE MINIMIZED I'm like a robot programmed to do it Rockin' body armor over top a black tunic My thoughts are protected by a helmet of iron With a menacing face-mask I'll tell when you're lying I'm the king in the sub-basement of the underground Gettin' down with the most thunderous sound You're a derelict degenerate, plague of humanity I'm jumping from the twelfth floor to land on the canopy Bounce to the street where we meet to do battle I've got the Kwan Dao to ensure my survival I go beneath the surface like Sektor in combat Uppercut your monocle and knock back your top-hat If life's got you down and you're feeling morose Buy a vile of my venom and then try out a dose From the handle of my cane I brandished a knife And etched into the brain "MC FOR LIFE" Wealth is no mark of nobility, nor do clothes in abundance prove chivalry Greed is the result of blindness to reality And this is the plight of humanity I drink a gallon of kombucha tea and wait for the rain It never came so we kept playing the game A swirl of dark grey now anchored in the heavens It was all tied up in the top of the seventh The skipper made a double switch He brought me in to play third base and Dan McKinney to pitch It went one, two, three, now it's time to wake the bats Shaking the cave walls with sonar raps I grabbed a stalagmite, ripped it from the ground Bringing terror in the eyes of the chump on the mound... ("Here's Typhoeus from the stretch... Earlier today he said his arm was a cannon, but it's M-C-D that the crowd is chanting!) You know I never like to let a crowd down Just like rocking a show with the loud sound I started slamming my chest like an ape in the mist and pointed my cudgel toward the starry abyss What happened to the pitch he was about to throw? Hear my next verse if you'd like to know! I swing with the force of a mountain dividing One solid connection sends 'em all flying I sent a shot to center, Otis Nixon is chasing Climbing up the wall like a flying Grayson Ascending the summit he extended his hand but the towering drive crashed into the stands That's my whole philosophy: give back to the fans With many souvenirs and solid gold jams Needless to say, we went on to clinch the pennant After all it's our home and we had to defend it We're blowing up your shed with a stereo bomb Y'all fools run around like Jerry and Tom I'm a mean rap scallion, a hip-hop bandit from the water margin and I brought a barge in Leveled my spear and started charging I'll never beg your pardon I'd rather die than live like you and your department What's crucial to you is immaterial to me What gives us both life you destroy foolishly So never consider me part of your organization My brain operates on a different vibration

HIGH CHIEFTAIN Stab my trident into the sky, I am the King Test my skills against any style that you may bring No, you never did stand a chance I've always been light-years ahead Once I was lost in an Ausable Chasm of thought A desolate place where a battle was fought I was just a kid not long ago with some administrator telling me, “son, you better flow to the status quo” To my death I would not row I swam upstream and against the current Beheaded the lecherous demon serpent I manned up quick as my name was engraved in the mission Kicked in the door and was assured a position High Chieftain, there I stood Fighting for all that's good, in the name of chivalry and brotherhood Convert those who became persuaded by ways of evil Alert foes that I won't submit until they place the people Above wealth and material gain Distribute cereal grain I seek to end famine with imperial reign I once raced in tangled ways, now my battle is righteous I won't be defeated, even if lifeless The next generation will spawn my likeness To carry on my fight with might for the bound and flightless To death you thought that I would plummet But I've persevered, and I'm rising toward the summit There is no match for the ever-victorious king I shine like a bright full moon a'center a glorious ring Golden shackles have been opened Locks of jade pulled asunder Boundaries in the mind destroyed Countless stars across the daunting void to compliment the many styles that I've employed A turbulent river snakes an icy mountain Hungry badger seizes trout from raging rapids Select a delectable stew chock full of tender chunks of prawn Then I enter the beyond... ...Where in flames you hoped I would meet demise But I survived and I'm forever on the RISE!

SUPER SOLAR PROMINENCE My hip-hop's like a poisonous frog Across a celestial smog Devouring stars with the gluttony Pac-Man had for pellets A rabid rap ravenous dog Attacking with a wild pack in the fog In my ascent to madness an alternate universe is developed Dragon smoke black wings fluttering in the moonlight (It's him!) Corpulent jargon, resembling a nice juicy duck (with the trim!) Poly-alphabetic, trochaic heptametric orbit irregulator My rap cipher is the outer most ring of Saturn and shrouded in vapor Retrograde motion, spiraling pattern to the depths of a cavern Now you're in the dark, with real country dark Let this be the lantern Super Solar Prominence Funk Irregular Space Rock for your nebula We're doing this for the nebula We're doing this for the nebula (And the quasar also) Every morning I light the sun then slice a bun and spread jam on it A werewolf on Mars has twice the fun Who could handle it? I'm ferocious, expialadocious stellar psychosis Meteor Shower on your look out tower, took out power Now it's cook out hour, and I've got a voracious appetite In one short cycle of the moon I digest a satellite Black hole soul, bout with red giants Now in dead silence The wickedest tyrants run from my dominance Super-Solar Prominence Funk over all Crash your gala with a wrecking ball I made from Jupiter and the same chains that once bound me to the wall It was nice and sunny When Ursa Major tried to heist my honey At first I chased her, but eventually relented and then presented a comb for the bear 'Cause I got plenty sweet treats to share Upon the first taste all fur fell from her face Girth disappeared from her waist Leaving the shape of lady in it's place A mighty fine asterism, liberated from her beastly prison Now she can bathe in the oceans waves on the horizon at last As I was blasting off she reached out for my hand and asked How could she ever thank me? To which I made a reply: Just keep dancing to my super-solar prominence funk in the sky

CONDUCT THE MADNESS I chuck songs like pumpkin bombs from Demogoblin Run and take cover if you heard my single droppin' Notify the Marshall with the feed back from the full stack It's best to pull back Respect that, MC Devlin the Large Dealing out another hand of poison edged cards My whiplash wire sets fire to the shire and I'm taking y'all higher than a mega volt charge The eater of worlds, stickin' eight with a skewer I warp through wards like Pennywise in the sewer In a smelling foulness that you can't imagine I open up the aqueduct and let it flood the beauty pageant Peelin' out the spiderweb like an ape gone bananas I raise a pen in Transylvania and Louisiana I'm always guided back home by the melody where the loose pit won't stop biting Penelope It has always been my wildest desire to pulverize psychopathic criminals while in stylish attire A well-trained conductor who when made mad Couldn't be stopped with a half a million breaks pads Truncate v-necks and wreck crews Run a Sawzall blade blade through your deck screws Hit the studio, lay down tracks I'm in and out, two or three casualties max Plus size model raps, blubbery blueberries bubbles bursting like kombucha bottle caps Climb a thorny vine to the nine sacred muses Imbibe lime flavored juices Now I write songs to make the air sound nicer And drown out the rattling noise in your Chrysler Rockin' the mic like Harry Kalas My only pitch is a screw ball and I'm tone deaf I broke the rules of music and became my own ref I'm ill as spawns cape, you're whack as Archie's sweater If you claim MC, I'll purloin a letter It's in plain sight, not hidden in subtext I shine bright light on myriad of subjects then my atoms dissipate and disperse "what was that?" "It was MC Devlin rapping yet another prodigious verse!" Strong arm a beat like O.G. Octavius Armed to the teeth like a Presa Canario My eight fold path now controls the whole radius Brainwash waves warp minds through your stereo Write down your troubles in a letter Then mail it first class to a shredder We've risen from the trench to lance a boil cluster M-A-D-C-O-N-Ductor!

OTRAS DIMENSIONES Paralelo con la corteza Como un disco volteando en la mesa Estoy perpendicular con el sistema solar Volar por la estrella El hombre lobo en la nave espacial Casco de vidrio mente Hago añicos los perimetros y los fragmentos son puentes hacia otras dimensiones Una mujer que defendia su vida con dos manos Manera suave como el poblano Distante del resto del mundo, donde las reglas son nulos Ella perdona toda la gente y se ve profundamente Vio el mal volver a las tinieblas así nació una nueva estrella! Yo vivo en ciento veintedos y un octavo En mi pizza no quiero pescado Mi esposa la sombra, Mi madre oscuridad, Mi hija frecuencia bajo Invisiblemente Estas siempre Adentro mi tormenta violenta sin tu sensei Despellar este gatito No se ve ni jota, dale la bota! Siempre estoy en dos sitios a la vez pero mi cabeza en tres Nadie cree una palabra de lo que dicen... porque sólo escriben! Me distraigo con los sueños. y cuando me levanto yo no lo comprendo. ¿Por qué se ha ido? y donde yo esté. los cuerpos celestes están flotando Vivo sin gravedad! miro hacia el futuro, nunca detrás!

ATOP AN ICE CAP At elementary level, I appeared to be Not taking my student career seriously The teacher would send letters home, And make me wear a pointy hat like David the Gnome 'Til I ran outside and smashed a sledge hammer with a fire hydrant And stayed pounding on, Even the whole town frowned upon the ground my sound was founded on Maybe I'm off my hinges Or the soil in my heart is too stony We can all go a little mad sometimes In this no poor soul is lonely Speak of the Devlin and he shall appear Swinging in on a gold chandelier I cause a clamor with my claw hammer grammar Chop wire taps with my rap fire ax Non-smoker, stir the embers with a long poker Ankle sock mix-matcher Always having fun so the clock ticks faster and faster Ah, what a life! I've fashioned armor to repel death's scythe And in Modesto I went to war with Mephisto I wasn't impressed though The magic he used was decent at best With a single spear thrust I opened his chest Darkness did flow profusely from the fissure of his wounded form I pierced it innumerable times, so my light shone through and space was born Rack 'em up, rack 'em up, rack 'em up (There's trouble on the way) Rack 'em up, rack 'em up, rack 'em up (That's what folks 'round here all say) Everything comes full circle and this is spherical So who's in the mood for a Christmas miracle? I hit the dynamic mic like a luge Switch my style like Ebeneezer Scrooge I'm no daily beggar going door to door I'm your friendly neighbor you've seen before The mixed creation of Bob Kane and Dante A Bat out of Hell, liberamente Detect this comet, examine my capital My economy defines comedy I eat raw pork with a three prong fork And extract worms on my way to work I'm a saw-tooth shark who's cutting figure eights in your brainwaves With my band tuning up on the main stage I never went mad for the same craze or ran around in a maze From atop an ice cap I watch 'em bicker The burg beneath me is bogging quicker As a caterpillar will cut through leaves A mighty deluge will uproot trees And with no timber left to mill All of us will be homeless with nil So fret not, with much persistence you'll worry that sickness into existence One law we're all captive under The fact that we always used to be younger Just be thankful you're still getting older The only alternative is much colder!

CLASH OF STAVES I push a rap passed the max load Rock a red cap like the Smack's toad I'll snap and go Jax mode with an ax if a stack's owed you'll need your back sewed Each one of my cuts becomes infected and gangrenous I wouldn't be going out on a limb to say you couldn't hang with this A lot of little rappers scorn this pen Cooking them and all their friends on the grill like Cornish hens George Foremen sends many condolences We had to knock the fat out I keep an emcee dizzy and his cutman busy No birds around your head, I bring the bats out Then I banish your style with the push of a button You're lost in space with a bunch of dumb pigs who just won't stop grunting Once you flip then you'll jump ship And get ripped to strips by my ninja star constellation From the station with a six piece band, mic in each hand I am a deep peaceful man, driving five under in a street legal van The world today in disarray With matchless courage I brandish a long battle ax and plunge into the fray Where Many foes wish to eradicate me I feint east, then strike west, parry south, hit north, like that I stay free We've got no troubles, so pop those snot nose bubbles And if won't stop raining then we're just gonna stomp through puddles The head honcho, my rhymes smell like a bushel of cilantro and my song is like Daewon upon a table going gonzo For the cherry jelly, I flipped on the mic like Vallely You choked on stage, so I gave you a mind-body fist to the belly It's no laugh when my bassist slaps with a bo-staff An up-right strung tight with the cables of an elevator shaft The vibrations will shake from your 90 foot scaffold Buckets of paint will crash down upon your head You shouldn't have raffled I keep a rap rolled up in a nine link chain whip When the tip hits, it trips the main chip, with this your brain flips If life was an album, I would be the song you wanna skip In peace I rip every star from your boulevard and darken the strip Sometimes you've gotta cross the street without looking Weave between cars and buses, duck under tractor trailers and keep booking We've all got someplace to be And I'm wanted on the frigid peak with the double-edged sword at a quarter to three Though we've got no worries, It's just a little wind and some flurries But if it won't stop snowing then we'll just sled down what it buries I will always be your comrade I'll always be a good friend who's looking out for you I will always be your comrade Wearing warpaint on my face, showin' out for you

ALL MEN ARE BROTHERS Constant turmoil pollutes the world and brings spoil Money's not the root of all evil, it's the soil From which a Crooked, twisting tree protrudes To cast it's shadows on the plants beside it Now we're blinded from the true light and raised in ultra violence All Men Are Brothers, of the same spring Our river was damned when greed became king It's royal subjects objective is to maim or kill to gain what amounts to nothing, and there remain, mosquitoes swarm when the pool is still Some chose to look the other way, soon the other way will reflect the same sick display Each nation a station of hell's dark stair case Youth in descent, a vile beast marks their face There march they save for one grace One radiant light cutting through the vast blackness An honor of our universal brotherhood in mass practice Setting aside frivolous conquest, we see progress If one man is hungry, all men need If one man is cut, all men bleed, One path all men lead (INSERT CHINESE SYMBOLS) All men are brothers! Men who spoke the truth were gunned down in cold blood And we're drowning in same old flood Lost in hypnosis Pleasure mistaken for happiness causes widespread psychosis To grind against the jagged edge is adjacent to hopeless By using tension you sacrifice mobility And stand stagnated in futility; picket signs won't afflict the minds of malicious ministers or quell their insatiable thirst for wealth that drains an order of corpses, a strike must be made from within the sorcerer's fortress A corrupt system will never undergo metamorphosis by being passively berated, It must be infiltrated and once control is seized, the heathen agenda is more easily obliterated, To reduce the slaughter use the fire, but be like water I am a man of no merit, limited to the verse I'll die poor and leave behind only words Could it be enough to inspire another? If they fry my right side, they'll also need to grill the other No torture could ever make me turn on my brother

A KNIGHT AMIDST CHAOS A carnival parade, a joyous way to spend an evening But what transpired, you'll have trouble believing It was the 29th of February, as I recall Ash colored clouds produced a light rain fall The showers wouldn't stop revelers from celebration Multitudes assembled at the festive occasion Elaborate floats with extravagant sculptures at the helm Of mythical creatures from mystical realms Men and women made merriment, children laughed excitedly Then from the sky came a great blast of lightening A lofty live oak collapsed on a power main Cables writhed on the street like worms split it twain Wind sent the flayed wires sparking up the block Delivering to what they touched such powerful shocks The stupendous floats received tremendous jolts of what I estimate to be about 1 billion volts! The next occurrence I feel batty to attest Bare with me good listener, and hear out the rest The fearsome float figures made of paper mache awoke and from their crafts and began tearing away Two fire breathing dragons and a hulking harlequin a jewel encrusted elephant, and an immense suited skeleton Also the Minotaur and a most hideous demon Ran rampant in the rain sending those revelers screamin' The police fired shots at the colossal foes Most were trampled to death....so it goes Buildings were crumbled, vehicles overturned People fled pell mell as their homes were burned As the city saw the reaper's sickle come into view I sprang into action, as I am one to do Between the two dragons, bravely I stood Taunting them to burn me as best as they could With dog like agility I leapt from my place And the dragons engulfed one another in flames The giant jester, jumped along, juggling cars Smashing 'em on the floor like quick draws guitars I raced to the next the one he chose for his play Stuffed my shirt in the gas tank and set it ablaze An explosion ensued enveloping the clown A hail colorful confetti fell to the ground The gem-adorned elephant was running amok When I noticed an abandoned concessions truck I packed 50 fifty pounds peanuts into a sack And motioned the mighty mammal over for a snack As the elephant dined, I gently petted his trunk Then he wrapped it around me and lifted me up Friends we became and onward we strode Sparing no effort, in the chaotic episode The over-sized skeleton danced in dapper clothes Knocking down lampposts and telephone poles Toward the finely dressed Ghost of John on my gold-tusked elephant I charged head on Colliding full force into the base of his shins All of his bones flew this and that-a-way like bowling pins The Minotaur stomped about city ramming in store front doors and windows, eating mannequins I propped a model up behind an open manhole And unleashed a shout to the unwitting manimal He raced forth and fell down into the sewer system An impossible labyrinth he'll never escape from One day I'll have a son to teach my sword techniques He'll descend into the foul maze and decapitate the beast A single menace left, the most dastardly one The bat-winged demon with the black snake tongue Mounted upon an old, decrepit cathedral The dark general directed a battalion of evil A throng of cadavers he amassed in force By robbing every grave in the city of it's corpse An army of this many was too much for one man So using my mind I devised a plan I sped to the city outskirts by the wharf To the warehouse where old parade floats were stored The figures of gods who inspired great poems Slumbering there in their fiberglass forms Dionysus, the god of wine and revelry Proteus, mutable god of the sea Morpheus, the god who appears in your dreams Mercury, the god of success and trickery My wish was to awaken these divine four to assist in vanquishing the archfiend in war With a couple copper cables hooked to a battery I jumped the first one, then zapped the other other three Instantly the great sculptures came to life And desperately I told them of my current strife Eager to serve, we marched on with courage To save our fair city from the maleficent scourge The demon divided his army into four separate flanks Each one stationed behind fortified banks His red skin flared, his tail pointed with a spike signaling his troops to advance and strike Our band was ready, we held our position Proteus loaned me his three pronged spear for the mission The first god to act was he from the vineyard Pouring from his endless jug he flooded the contenders The first flank was drowned in the rush of Merlot The few who could stand were too drunk to stone a throw Next to turn the tide was the god from the ocean summoning a thousand seals in one swift motion The canines of the sea were commanded to attack Then in the form of a wave he washed away the second pack With half an army left Morpheus took a stand Cast a spell of hypnosis learned from his old man Vaulting into their minds he cast horrible sights The third flank ran frantically from the fight Now Mercury stepped up disguised as the demon leader And ordered the last few soldiers to follow He led the regiment directly into the river And by the violent current the fourth flank was swallowed The demon's ire swelled as he watched his troops fall With the weapon on my back, I scaled up the wall Reaching the perch where the heinous one sat I challenged my horned adversary to combat Without a hesitation he whipped his tail around Which I skipped like a rope and gave his skull a fierce pound In a rage he rushed right at me full-fledged I dodged and speared his wing as he fell over the edge Plummeting like a rock for a twelfth of a mile When he landed his heart was pierced by a sundial Down below a crowd of spectators cheered I thanked my four allies, who winked and disappeared A ceremony was held in my honor the next day both peasants and royalty had this to say: "Long Live Devlin, the Noble MC" "Who guides us through chaos to peace and safety" And so I responded: Hear ye, hear ye, my kindly neighbors You need not thank me, but do me this favor Raise up your vino, your ale, or your spirit And lend an ear for a toast, should you care to hear it May your waters be clean and your moons be many Your foes be few and your pals be plenty A toast to all of those elevated to knighthood by raising their sword in the fight for good

GHOST BAND Ghost band, rockin' the ghost jam In the ghost van haunting the coast Ghost band rockin' the ghost jam Touring in the ghost van haunting the coast It was a G30 motorhome, '76, We were racking up the odometer clicks Six in the band, plus a roadie and a dog Headed to another show in an ominous fog I was in the back like a dummy cold chillin' with the deck sprawled out playing rummy five million Six wheels spinnin' then one of 'em popped but the shoulder was blocked, so we could not stop Road work ahead, as we approached a cattle chute along side a tractor trailer loaded with chicken coupes Two forces collided and a victor emerged It wasn't us, but the truck full of birds It's bad when one thing becomes two Especially when it is you I marveled the world beyond the bug splattered glass And then face first through it I did smash I came to, feeling confused To my astonishment I received not a bruise And despite what I thought, the RV was still in one piece So I called D's on the front seat Posse present and ready to go Thankfully we would not miss the show We had a good scare but seemed to be alright and on we continued in the cold, dark night Made it to the club, fans lined around the corner We barreled backstage where we found the promoter He seemed to ignore us, it felt kinda rude I figured the dude was just in a bad mood When leaving the greenroom to set up our gear I gasped at the ghastly sight in the mirror There I beheld my rhythm section were holding their instruments but had no reflection! It was so, we had become apparitions Incorporeal rap musicians Seeing no need for further delay I said check 1,2 and we began play The audience stood in fear and shock For they saw no form, but could hear us rock a spectreful score they came to adore soon on the dance floor they were screaming for more It was a hip-hop seance, a jam phantasm I splashed the whole crowd with ectoplasm We rocked ghost jams from twelve til four with people still pouring through the door Flying around room, and floating through walls We exited the stage to a roaring applause Meanwhile the promoter snuck out with our loot So we haunted his house 'til he jumped off the roof I'm a supernatural rapper, I rock heavy chains They aren't to flaunt, they're to haunt the stage And nobody had to inform the coroner That my man right here is an organ donor!